In a world where blogging is no longer a rarity, it can be hard to have a blog that “matters”, that stands out, that people want to follow over others. For me, blogging isn’t about what everyone else wants, I do it for me. Not just to show off my clothes and accessories, but as a creative outlet and a hobby that fulfills me in a way that other aspects of my life don’t. Not to say that my life is not fulfilling. I have a wonderful husband and two gorgeous babies, along with close knit extended family and in-laws and some pretty great friends. All of those things are great, but blogging gives me a little something extra.
For as long as I can remember, fashion (and consequently shopping) has always been my favorite “hobby” if you will. Some may not consider it a hobby, that’s fine, I’ll call it a passion then. Bottom line, it’s what I love. It’s what I’ve always loved. And I always will. My parents will attest to this.
So this brings me to the reason I decided to start a fashion related blog. I had wanted to try blogging for about 3 years before actually making it happen. I had many friends who encouraged me to do so, who would even help me brainstorm name ideas for it. I used to work in fashion retail/e-commerce, so having people in that industry who believed this is something I could be good at meant a lot, and it was a big motivator. Well, I quit working when I was 25, after finding out my husband and I were expecting our first baby. I had just started a new job three weeks prior, and knew I wanted to stay home after having a baby. So I went ahead and quit my (very) stressful new job to have a relaxing pregnancy and continue on as a stay at home mom after the baby was born.
Our daughter came into the world in March of 2014. And she was perfect. Life was perfect. Hard, but perfect. (Side note: I fully believe that no matter how “ready” you think you are to have a baby, regardless of your age, you still cannot imagine the impact it will have on your daily life.) I quickly became aware of how much of my time was spent caring for our new baby. And don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed it, but like I said, huge change. I went from having all the time in the world to myself to not even knowing when I would eat or shower next. I think it’s easy to forget to do things for yourself, and more importantly, to remember to do things you enjoy (aside from taking care of that precious little life He just gave you). Of course, the baby’s needs come first. But I think so many mothers almost forget to be themselves in the midst of life with littles due to the demands of motherhood that cannot be ignored or pushed aside.
As I slowly started to venture out of our house with my new little one, I began to notice people always asking how the baby is, but not necessarily asking how I am. Nobody meant to purposely not ask about me, it’s human nature to ask about the baby. But it made me realize something, I no longer “did” anything other than be a mom. That had become my only identity. And, albeit, a good one, I wanted more. I noticed that people who I didn’t see often would never ask me about my job anymore, because I didn’t have one, at least not a paying job in an office. The only thing people knew to talk to me about was my baby. And, I mean, yeah, she’s totally adorable, so who can blame them?! But I missed feeling like I was a part of the world outside my house. So I finally gathered up the courage to put myself out there and try out blogging.
I posted my first post on Wear + When in July of 2014, about 3 1/2 months after I had our daughter. I was so nervous about everyone’s reaction. It was such a huge relief when my close friends and family reacted positively to it. I felt like, ok, this could actually work out! But I knew, that even if it didn’t, it felt good to do something I’ve always wanted to do, that combined all of my favorite things. I should also mention, I graduated with a degree in journalism. So writing is also fun for me, and gives me that creative outlet. And this one is a little more embarrassing to admit, but I always wanted to be a professional model. It stems from people telling me I could do it when I was 13, crazy skinny, and awkwardly tall. But since it coincides with fashion, I was all over it. I tried my hand at it and did a small amount of local work before officially letting that dream die. So basically, between writing about fashion and taking pictures of myself wearing my favorite pieces, blogging lets be everything I ever wanted to be when I grew up, in addition to being a mom.
It has taken me a LONG time to grow my blog. Like, definitely longer than most other bloggers I feel like. It can be really hard to find the time to take pictures, let alone getting photos that are good enough to feel confident about posting. When I first started out, I couldn’t justify paying a professional photographer to shoot my looks. Not to mention there was the issue of what to do with my children during a shoot (of course, sometimes that still becomes an issue). There were a few times I thought about quitting, but then I would remember why I started in the first place, and the love I have for this hobby. Well, three years later, I’m finally starting to see some growth. And it feels GOOD y’all. I used to tell my husband all the time, “It may take me 5 years to make this thing a success, but I have to get there.” He supported me every single step of the way, and continues to do so. And for that, I could not be more grateful. (Love you B!)
This is sort of a side note, but I feel like it’s important to say. I knew when I started this blog that not everyone would be a fan. I often say, that when you put yourself out there in a public forum, you have to know that not everyone will love you. Some people will, some people will be indifferent, and some will just flat out not like you for whatever reason. You have to take the good with the bad, and accept that you may not be everyone’s cup of tea. I have actually had people reach out to me to tell me they aren’t into what I’m doing and that they can’t support it, and that’s ok…because I’m not doing it for you. I’m doing it for me. And if you like it, that’s awesome. That may sound a bit harsh, but it’s the truth. I blog for me. I wanted to say this because I know so many people are afraid of trying something because they are afraid of what others might think. But sometimes we have to do things for ourselves. Especially as moms, since so much of our time is spent taking care of others. Mother or not though, if you have a dream, go for it. Even if you are afraid of failing. If it is something that will bring you joy and fulfillment, it’s worth a shot.
Photos by: Julia Gozman Photography